We started our new Beth Moore Bible study at church last week, and I’m so excited. At last, I’ve found a new direction for this blog, something I’ve prayed about all summer. Instead of popping in daily to chat like I’ve done the past two years, my plan now is to write a weekly devotional reflecting on what I’ve learned. I hope you’ll join the journey with me!

We’re studying Daniel. If you’ve gone through this before, what did you think? If you’d like to join me here through watching the DVD and studying on your own, that would be great. Let’s go!

Looking Back
In my early 20s, I went to live in Japan to teach English. I worked for a Japanese Christian church and stayed with a Japanese family my first year there.

After living overseas for about six months, I began to wonder what my next step should be. Did God want me to spend the rest of my life in Japan, as a single career missionary and teacher? If so, why did I have such a strong desire to get married and have children? Did He want me to come home and work or go back to school?

As I began to pray deeply about this matter, a certain school came into my mind. I sent off for information about this school, a Bible college near my home state, which offered several programs for graduate students. (This is before we could research online!)

When the packet from the school arrived, I tore open the manila envelope and gazed longingly at the glossy pictures inside. Young men and women sitting under trees, Bibles open, intensely studying the Word of God. My heart beat faster thinking how wonderful it would be to delve into Hebrew and Greek, gaining a greater understanding of the Bible’s original languages. I couldn’t imagine anything more exciting than going to this school!

Yet when I looked into the cost of tuition, I didn’t see how I could pay for it. I didn’t want to ask my parents for money, and I didn’t feel like I had anything unique to offer to apply for a scholarship. I was just one of thousands of confused 20-somethings, wondering what the next step of my life should be.

So instead of applying to this Bible college, I decided to stay in Japan another year and work on saving money. I shifted my schedule around, allowing me to take on a few higher-paying teaching jobs, and I visited a Japanese university that offered an Asian studies program for foreign students.

Based on my application and interview, this school offered me a teaching assistantship so my tuition was paid for. It was an incredible opportunity. God allowed me to go to school – just like I’d prayed for! But instead of studying the Bible on an American campus, I was studying Japanese culture, art, history, and language at a university in Japan.

Taking the Next Step
By the time I felt sure God was leading me back to the U.S. I was engaged to be married in a few months (another long story.) Our first year of marriage, I attended graduate school full-time (along with my husband), and I worked two jobs to help pay for it – writing articles for the campus newspaper and working in marketing for the university publisher.

Years later, I’m at LAST able to study the Bible intensely like I’ve always dreamed of. Instead of sitting under trees on a gorgeous campus in my early 20s, I’m now in my late 30s, a busy mother and wife, studying on my kitchen table and in a classroom at church. I watch my teacher on video, a dynamic Texan woman who makes me laugh and cry with her powerful testimony.

Instead of serving God on an overseas mission field, here I am, blogging away. Some of you are reading this on a computer thousands of miles from me. Hello! Bonjour! Konnichiwa! Guten Tag! Within the walls of my own home, I have five little souls who hear me share the excitement daily. Lord willing, I want to raise a new generation of Daniels!

Everyone says you get out of Bible study what you put into it. This would be a very shallow experience if I only went to the meetings, sat through the videos, then did nothing on my own. What makes this study so rich is the one-on-one time I spend with the Holy Spirit, as I encounter Him, my Teacher, in my individual devotional time.

In the introduction to Daniel, Beth Moore says, “If The Patriarchs was a camel ride, this one … is a rocket ride — with the windows open.” She later writes, “The wind of the Holy Spirit blows so hard through some of these scriptures, you may have to re-fix your hair.”

Ready to Blast Off!
Years and years have gone by since I first prayed, “Lord, please open the doors for me to study Your Word!” The past decade I’ve spent bearing and nursing children has consumed me and kept me so physically exhausted, I’ve had to prop my eyelids open to study.

And to be honest, I’ve never made it through a whole Beth Moore study intact – I’ve always gotten overwhelmed with the busy-ness of life, sick children who’ve kept me at home and away from the fellowship, and distractions.

Will you pray for me? I’m starting out with such dreams of completing all the homework and attending every session for the next 12 weeks. My life is so hectic right now — yet I don’t want to give up on this!

Connecting Hearts
What are you going through now? Are you able to get some Bible study in, somehow, someway? Ask God to open up your schedule so that you can. You’ll impact every person who comes into contact with you. This is truly exciting!

Lord, as moms, we’re busy women. We’re tired! We can’t get up early like we want to because we were up late last night feeding the baby or nursing the sick. We wake up in the morning and face mountains of laundry and piles of dishes. Our to-do list includes everything but spending time with you. Help us, Lord! Give us energy and time. Deepen our joy and longing to spend time with you. Amen.

I can’t believe this is my first time posting in three months. How are you? Is anyone there? I’ve missed this place — and you people.

I hope you had a great summer.

Our schools started back last Friday — so we’re slowly adjusting to our new schedule. But preschool here doesn’t begin until after Labor Day (early September), so my posting will still be light for a while.

Although I don’t have kids swinging from the chandeliers, I do have them jumping on my back while I write … which can be hazardous to my productivity.

Yesterday, I actually found myself belting this command: “Stop it! You may NOT swing on the pantry doorknob!” Several times throughout the day, I had to reassure my four-year-old that he’s from earth — not Mars (as his older sister told him.) And yes, he can wear his dinosaur costume when we pick up his brother at football practice, but he can’t wear his Storm Trooper mask in the grocery store — because he KNOWS it makes his baby sister cry. (And no light sabers in the car!)

I do have so much I want to tell you about our summer — but it’s not over yet!

My current most exciting piece of news is that I SAW and HEARD Beth Moore speak in person at Women of Faith last weekend. WOW!!

I really considered quitting blogging until I heard Beth Moore — but she got me so fired up again.

A group of moms at my church will be starting her Daniel study in three weeks — and how in the world can I dig that much into the Word without sharing it here? Every single person who has done that study has told me the same thing: “It changed my life.”

Well! I do miss writing here — but blogging is like eating chocolate for me. I can only indulge in small bites, or it becomes an addiction. My plan is to try to limit myself to posting twice a week, and only when my children are at school.

For now, I hope you’ll check out the new August issue of Christian Women Online — especially if you’re a fan of Mandisa! My last Book Buzz column is here — I’ve thoroughly enjoyed my stint as a reviewer and wish I could do it forever, but someone new will be taking this over — and I pray she’ll be as blessed as I have been. (My shelves overflow!)

For all of you writing parents out there, I hope you’ll check out my “Parent Muse” column at Spirit-Led Writer on how to find time to write while surrounded by kids. I’ve also been posting monthly over at Writer … Interrupted, and my latest tip encourages parent writers to pen a letter to someone who needs a bit of a boost. You can read it here.

I’m off …

(And in case you see a woman in the grocery store followed by a light saber-wielding dinosaur in a Storm Trooper mask asking if he’s from Mars … um, that would be me.)

There’s a little gathering going on today over at Robin’s Little Bits of Life blog to discuss Beth Moore’s new book, Get Out of That Pit. I learned about this from Boomama. Since I haven’t read the book (and don’t have time to now), I may lurk a bit and see what everyone’s saying about it.

On a different topic …

Last night I went to a Ladies Night Out banquet at my church, along with about 400 other women. And something weird happened. Twice.

I had a reserved seat at a table, thanks to my Sunday school teacher. When I got there (a few minutes late), there was only one seat left at the table. To my right was my Sunday school teacher, who is one of my mentors. Her five kids are mostly older than mine, and I hang onto her every word because she is one of the most JOYFUL people I know.

To my left was a friend I hadn’t seen in a long time. We’d met in a Bible study about seven years ago, but then she and her husband had moved to a different church. Anyway, it’s one of those friendships where the gap between then and now closes in about two sentences.

After a while, I asked her if she’d read anything good lately (always my favorite topic), and she said, “You know, the Lord has really convicted me about reading lately. I’m just a book-a-holic. I love books! But then I felt like I wanted to read other books more than read the Word. So right now, I’m only focusing on the Bible. It’s great. It’s so refreshing. I can’t wait to get up and read the Word every day.”

Wow. I felt like someone had just splashed a bucket of cold water right in my face. In a good way — like wake up, girl, and see what’s really important. We then talked about the Bible — me confessing that I’ve gotten bogged down in the Mosaic Law in my reading, and she telling me what she’s been learning about the New Testament church. Oh, I love having a friend like this.

Then! (in a rambly mood today) …

We got split up from each other. After the banquet, we all needed to move from the fellowship hall to the sanctuary because our speaker needed room for PROPS. Some women went to wait in a ridiculously long line at the restroom. I decided to stop at the speaker’s book table, you know, to see what books she had available.

After a few minutes, I sauntered alone into the sanctuary, which was packed. Several people waved at me, but I was in sort of a daze and kept walking toward the front. I looked over to my left, about three rows back — and there was my old friend I’d sat next to at dinner with a spot for me next to her. So we had another chance to talk again.

This time we changed topics, and I confessed to her that my husband and I have been thinking about thinking about moving — closer to his new job. When I mentioned the part of town we were considering, she burst out, “Oh! That’s right near [such-and-such] church. You will HAVE to go visit that church. The pastor’s sermons are incredible — you’ll be spiritually Blown Away.”

The very weird thing is … that church sounded familiar … and I wondered if it was the same one where some of my college friends attend — friends I don’t get to see often, but our kids are the same age, and we talk on the phone every now and then.

This little seed was planted. About that church. Why in the world, of all people for me to sit next to twice, did I find someone who KNEW about that church?

So I called one of my college friends this morning, and I had this little fluttery feeling in my heart, like I was scared to ask. Scared to be disappointed. But I did. “Um … I was just wondering. What church do y’all go to?”

THAT church.

So I told her we were doing some online house research around that area, and she proceeded to tell me why we would LOVE that church and all the people who go there, many of whom I already know. “This church will be great for your ministry,” she told me. She also said, “You know, the Lord has put you on my heart the past few weeks, and I’ve been praying for you, Heather. I didn’t know what it was about, but I just started praying for you. I even told [my husband] about it. Well, now I know! You need to move here!”

So there’s my two weird things … actually three:
— sitting next to my friend who says she’s not reading any other books besides the Bible and feeling WHOOSH! The Holy Spirit whispering to me.
— her later telling me about this fantastic church
— talking to my old college friend this morning who also goes to that church, and her telling me she’s been praying for me.

I wanted to blog about it — because if I don’t write it down, I’ll forget it. I absolutely HATE moving — having strangers walk through my house, realtors in my driveway with their cell phones and “a client” when you’re sitting down to eat. Big decisions. Contracts. Money. Scary stuff.

But these three weird things, bits of conversation, are like seeds. Something has been planted. I have to learn to trust God to water those seeds if they’re to grow. The verse from Luke 1:37 comes to mind: “For nothing will be impossible with God.”

P.S. A percentage of proceeds from last night’s banquet went to support Alzheimer’s research. Here’s a picture of me helping out at our local Memory Walk a few months ago. I had the Very Important job of blowing up balloons and tying them to this sign. (Hat tip to Carol, who blogged about her Memory Walk in Texas).

My face is so red!

I checked my blog stats yesterday and wondered why the top keyword search the past couple of months here has been “Beth Moore Blog.”

I haven’t blogged about Beth Moore since last September, so people are going back and reading through my archives of when we did the online Living Beyond Yourself Bible Study.

Then I googled “Beth Moore Blog” to see what the URL was for Beth Moore’s blog — and out of nearly 900,000 sites, Mom 2 Mom Connection popped up first! I’m mortified! Beth Moore is a Very Important Person! What are all these people thinking when they accidentally end up here? Why am I considered the #1 authority on Beth Moore’s blog?

Scary.

Actually, Beth’s Living Proof Ministries DOES have a new blog. She blogs with her daughter, Amanda, and today there is also a post by her daughter, Melissa, on American Idolatry. Now that sure seems like a fun mother/ daughter activity. The main blog link is here.

The big thrill for me is that … if everything works out … I’m going to go HEAR Beth Moore speak in person!

We’re making our plans now to attend the 2007 Women of Faith conference, which will be August 10-11 in Atlanta.

If you found my blog through a google search, click here to read the Living Proof Ministries Blog. And click here to find out if there’s a Women of Faith conference coming near your city. I went last year and had an awesome time and can’t wait for this year!

[Edit: I have been informed that individual tickets are already sold out for the Atlanta conference! You have to find tickets through block seating, such as churches that buy huge blocks. Oh, this thing is going to be so FUN!]

I don’t have anything important to attempt to say today. I just wanna talk to somebody … when it’s convenient for you to check out my blog.

Here’s what’s up … and why I’m feeling down.

This morning, right now at this very minute, a few miles from my house, I could be sitting in a clean, air-conditioned room with about 15 other women, watching Beth Moore teach on a giant video screen. As I’m typing now, at 9:40 am, our group is probably finishing up the discussion of our third week’s topic, Love. We’re studying Living Beyond Yourself, and WAAAHHH! I want to be there!!

Here’s why I’m not there. I’m holding my 18-month-old who has thrown up on me twice already this morning. She’s hot as fire, burning up with fever. I didn’t know she was sick until last night, while I was chatting with some moms at the church playground, enjoying myself for a few minutes until … BLAHK … she threw up all over me. This is why I do not even pretend that I have my act together.

My three-year-old is still upstairs in his bed asleep. I’ve checked on him nine times already. He was also feverish last night. I’m letting him sleep as long as he wants. Maybe he’ll wake up and have this thing kicked. It’s our first fall virus, one of the joys we get from being sociable and active in church this year. We’ve even dubbed these nasty things the “Wednesday viruses” because the symptoms always show up on Wednesdays after we go to church on Sundays.

So I’m not at Bible Study, interacting with my wonderful adult women friends. I’m also not at the gym with my friend Mary who asked me again to work out with her. She keeps reminding me she wants to teach me the circuit machines, and the last time she saw me she said, “I’ve got to show you how to use the Butt-Blaster. You won’t believe the results once you use it for about three weeks.” I’m sorry, that’s not a word I use or even type, but I couldn’t help it. There’s no better name for a machine that does THAT, is there?

I’m also not going to be able to watch my son’s flag football team in the championship game today. They’re playing an hour away, and the best I’ve done is send the grandparents an email with directions to the game, hoping one of them might be able to go. Another reason I feel like a terrible failure of a mom today.

And let’s also toss in my worries about tomorrow. We’ve invited two of my son’s friends to spend the night — our plans are to build a bonfire and roast hot dogs or s’mores. But what if my little ones don’t get better today? Ethically, I’ll have to cancel these plans.

Tomorrow, I’m also supposed to cook a chicken casserole to deliver to a friend in my women’s club who has a newborn baby and is recovering from a horrendous delivery in which she had to have emergency surgery and a blood transfusion. Furthermore, she had to have another painful procedure done yesterday, which may affect her ability to nurse. I’m really looking forward to visiting her tomorrow and taking her a little gift, along with my part of the meal (another friend is helping me.) But I can’t do this if I’m a traveling virus.

So! I told my husband this morning at breakfast — this is why so many stay-home moms find connection through blogging. I know this is a season of life that doesn’t last forever — and someday my kids will be older and won’t get sick as often. My elementary-aged kids hardly ever get sick — and unless they have a fever, I send them on to school.

My husband reminded me — well, at least I don’t have to be stressed about finding a sitter because I have to get to work. Yes, that’s true. But we were also talking last night about how useful it might be if I could teach English in a private Christian school someday — so we could get reduced tuition and use my salary to pay the rest of the tuition and expenses. That would be nice indeed and would give me something creative to do with this love I have of writing and encouraging other people to write.

Someday … but not today. My greatest ambition today is to blog about my desperate life in the hopes that one of you out there who may also be having a discouraging day may feel a little better. Or just in case you think I might have my act together because my blog appears clean on your screen and there are no crushed cheerios or globs of peanut butter on it, you’ll see that appearances can be deceiving.

I’m hoping I’ll be able to take a shower today, and maybe finish up organizing the last upstairs closet from our autumn fling. I’ll be making chicken broth soup and jello, and reminding my husband to pick up Pedialyte on his way home (can’t live without that stuff in the winter when you’ve got preschoolers or babies.)

Thanks for listening … I feel better already. Can’t beat the price of blogging!

This is my last post for our Beth Moore LBY study — I think we were supposed to end last Friday — but I fell further and further behind. The end of the school year filled up my “spare” time (as if that even exists), and we also took a family vacation last week. My mind was on packing up our family of seven for the beach — and even though I wrote a few posts ahead of time, I just couldn’t get this one written.

Overall, this was a great study — Beth Moore is one of the most incredible Bible teachers I’ve ever heard. I finally realized what it is about her that makes her so effective — it’s her stories. I don’t know if she just has a fantastic memory or if it’s her preparation before each lesson (probably both) — but she never makes a single point without fleshing it out with half a dozen well chosen anecdotes. She tells stories about herself, people she knows, and of course she brings to life heroes and heroines of the Bible, making us feel like we know them personally.

Before each lesson, Beth reviewed the sign language for the nine characteristics of the fruit of the Spirit — and she gave us a little phrase to remember for each one:

Love never fails.
Joy cometh.
Peace rules.
Patience waits.
Kindness tenders.
Goodness does.
Faith fights.
Gentleness bows.
Self-control stops.

The last two sessions covered the topics of gentleness and self-control. Honestly, I was surprised at where she took the topic of gentleness. I admit that I’m a little squeamish about the word “meek.” I don’t consider myself a meek person — though my husband reminds me that the Biblical form of meekness connotes strength. Beth focused on how “the way up is always down.” As we learn to bow before Christ with humility, we can learn to follow His ways. She spent a good deal of time discussing the story of Job, and how his trials were deeply wounding and emotionally charged — similar to those of Jesus Christ.

Several points stuck with me — but mainly she said we need to slow down our pace of life and “Be still before the throne of God” so that He can heal us. If we’ve been hurt or have raw, jagged wounds from something, we can’t expect them to be bound (healed) without time. “Wounds need binding, and binding take time,” she said. Even though wounds may eventually be healed, sometimes there are scars — the same way that Christ had nail scars in his hands. These scars remain so that others can touch them — and see that since we survived, maybe they can too.

The final session of the study was on self-control. Beth’s teaching focused mainly on our bodies as a temple of the Holy Spirit. She said there are two extremes — we can either neglect our temples, or become obsessed by them. In the Old Testament, this is what God was constantly having to chastise His people for: neglect of the physical temple — or idolatry.

I was shocked when she said this: the three or four generations of people that occupy our planet today are the first media-driven culture ever. “This is huge,” she said. “We’re basing how we view ourselves on something that’s not even real.”

I’d never really thought about it — but my great-grandmother did not have to stand in the check-out line at the grocery store and compare her body to women on the front of magazines. Even at Publix, which covers the sleazy ones up (thanks to one of my friends talking to management), it’s still easy to compare how you look to those models on the magazine covers and wonder if you too should be “sexy after 40.” I don’t think my great-grandmother thought much about toning up her abs so she could wear a midriff-bearing tank top!

Beth told a story about how she was with some models waiting to go on a TV show, and they were flipping through a magazine looking at some of their own photographs, and one of them said, “Look at this! Here’s my face, but those are NOT my legs!” So what we’re seeing in the media is digitally doctored and not even real. No wonder so many women struggle with low self-images. Beth Moore says it’s nothing but idolatry, and in her best Texas drawl she implored us to “Learn to do what we need to do, then GET ON WITH LIVING.”

There are so many more stories she told — but the main idea I got is that we need to recapture the “lost art of moderation.” Moderation! We shouldn’t go to the extremes of neglecting ourselves (letting those love handles get thicker every year) — and neither should we become obsessive and make our diets and exercise into a false god.

The study ended with her praying for us all — that we would dedicate our temple (our mind, body, and soul) in its entirety to the “living fruit of the Word of God.”

I’m Almost Done!
This is a long post — but I have to add a few more things about the format of this study because I’m not sure if it’s ever been done in this way before! We started out with a group of 30 women bloggers from all over the world. At first, I was so excited about the study — and I knew this is what God wanted me to be doing. In fact, I thought maybe the whole purpose for my blogging was because of this study — since several people who read about it here joined the group and told others about it on their blogs. The more the merrier, I thought.

Our instructions were to watch the video on Monday, do the homework throughout the week, then post about what we learned on Friday night or Saturday. We were also encouraged to go visit and comment on the other women’s blogs in our group to show support for each other.

I did this faithfully the first few weeks. I posted on time, then I spent a couple of hours throughout the weekend visiting and commenting on other blogs. But after visiting about 15, my head began to spin. I couldn’t always come up with a unique comment when several people already commented before me. I resorted to exclamation points and smiley faces to fill up for my lack of words. I sincerely wanted to encourage each blogger who took the time to share her heart. And wow — there was a lot of deep soul-searching in these posts.

I had no idea how overwhelming it would be to keep up — it’s one thing to sit in a room of people and make comments on things you’re learning — yet it’s something entirely more terrifying to voice your thoughts out for anyone in the world to read — ZIP! As soon as your words are sucked up by the latest RSS feeder. You can’t take them back or change your mind. After a few weeks, I began to lose steam.

Others did too, it seems. We’re women — busy tending our households, jobs, families, little league games, moving, teaching at retreats, traveling, sharing recipes, making summer plans, etc. None of us knew how to hold each other accountable — I mean, in a group that meets in person, you can just say, “Hey, I missed you last week — is everything OK?” But with a blogger, you might feel like you’re being nosy or critical if you ask why they didn’t post about it.

Yet so many positive things did come out of this study — for me and for others as well. And I’ve only begun to grasp these concepts on a deeper level. I’ll be doing this study again in the fall with a group of moms who have our children together in preschool. We’ll have refreshments of course and lots of laughter — and through meeting together, we’ll learn and grow — and pray for each other.

I think this would be a wonderful study for teenage girls — they need this wisdom NOW. If you have a teenage girl in your household, this would be awesome for her and a group of her friends to study together. You can learn more about Beth Moore here at Living Proof Ministries (including an update written by Beth about her recent health scare.)

C’est finis.

Addie	Heather*	Carol
M	Rach	Jeana
Jenn	Amanda	MamaB
GiBee	Boomama	Maria
Blair	Heather	Nancy
Janna	Flipflop	Robin
Sherry	Patricia	Tara
Lauren	HolyMama!	Faith
Christy	Eph2810	Karin
Leann	Rachel	Janice

I loved watching the Beth Moore Living Beyond Yourself video this week on the topic of “Faith” (I’m a little behind). We’re on Week 9 out of 10 (I think), and we’ve worked out a few kinks behind the scenes with our group. We now have a real “list” that is private, and we’re able to exchange emails and share things that we don’t even dare blog about. It’s been a great source of encouragement for me.

First of all, I want to tell you I’ve become a very quiet blog reader lately. For those of you who are wondering if I’m still around, I’ll tell you that I’m reading your blogs in my Bloglines, and I’m just not commenting. Forgive me. The end of the school year is CRAZY busy around here.

I love all the things I’ve been learning through this study. It’s beyond eery how I’ll hear or read a verse from Beth Moore, then I’ll read it again in a book or hear it from a sermon. The same day! God is speaking to me in so many ways.

A few months ago, I had a crisis of faith. I really had some major doubts — about EVERYTHING. Do you ever feel this way — like you’re being tumbled around in a dryer full of wet clothes? Well, it started with lightning striking our computer, despite those surge protector things. It zapped our modem, printer, and hard drive. I was disconnected for about four days while we got some things fixed.

The timing couldn’t have been worse. After spending months of scribbling down design ideas and agonizing over every detail, I’d finally sent off my design order to start my blog! I had used PayPal for the first time ever and even signed up for my hosting service. Then — ZAP! Computer gone.

I was so worried my designer would call me with a question! And I’d set the goal of starting my blog by the first of October so I’d have a few posts written before the Glorieta writers’ conference in late October.

My husband put up with my calling him two or three times a day and asking him to check my email. After the fourth day, I walked to the mailbox in complete despair. I’m sorry I sound so shallow — but I keep up with everyone by email — even my parents, siblings, and local friends!

I remember walking back from the mailbox, and I was letting my thoughts run away with worry. What would we do if I could never get online again? What if I missed my deadlines? What if my husband’s car wore out?

We have a long driveway, and my fears raced even further. What are we going to do when our kids discover we’re the only people around who don’t own any video games? What if they start realizing their clothes aren’t name brands? How will we ever put five kids through college? What about weddings?!!

Aaggghhhh!!!

For just a minute, I thought, Is God real? Is He really there? If He cared about me, then how come I’m feeling so lost and disconnected?

I know this may sound a bit kooky, but at that moment, I looked up, and the sky was completely clear and blue except for a white slash of clouds that were shaped perfectly like a cross. And I felt this impression in my heart of the Holy Spirit saying, I’m Here.

That was one of those moments I’ll never forget.

The next day, we were back online, and I had an email from someone inviting me to send a resume pronto for a possible devotional project. The editor was passing out assignments, and I might find a spot. So I sent it (by email of course). And I somehow got offered an assignment to help three other writers work on a book.

The title? Faith for Each Day.

So my crisis of faith led to an open door for me to help write a book on faith! Even more amazing, a friend invited me to join Beth Moore’s Believing God Bible Study, so I was suddenly surrounded by godly awesome women and the richest teaching I’d had in years.

I turned in my work on time, and the editor asked if I’d write a few more. I ended up writing over a hundred devotionals for this book. It’s being released soon — so if you see it, maybe my name will be written somewhere teeny-tiny along with a bunch of other people on the back of the title page.

Here’s what the publisher says about the book:

Like a daily energy boost, these inspiring entries begin with an insightful scripture followed by a powerful, relevant-to-the-day devotion that will remind readers that God truly longs for us to start the day with Him, that He is present in our lives even when things seem hectic, and He desires to richly bless us.

Hmmmm … So that’s what happens when I have a crisis of faith. From now on, I’m “Believing God,” and “Living Beyond Myself.”

Addie	Heather*	Carol
M	Rach	Jeana
Jenn	Amanda	MamaB
GiBee	Boomama	Maria
Blair	Heather	Nancy
Janna	Flipflop	Robin
Sherry	Patricia	Tara
Lauren	HolyMama!	Faith
Christy	Eph2810	Karin
Leann	Rachel	Janice

Here’s a great quote I read this week, that I thought applied well to our Beth Moore study of Living Beyond Yourself:

“All the fruits of the Spirit which we are to lay weight upon as evidential of grace, are summed up in charity, or Christian love; because this is the sum of all grace. And the only way, therefore, in which any can know their good estate, is by discerning the exercises of this divine charity in their hearts; for without charity, let men have what gifts you please, they are nothing.”

I am behind this week on our study. Actually, I haven’t even downloaded the video or the homework yet. (YIKES!!) I’ve been so busy wrapping up the Mother’s Love writing contest that ended here on Monday. And I’ve been corresponding with my FOUR wonderful, unbiased judges who are helping me, as well as reading through nearly 40 fantastic essays and poems. I’ve laughed, cried, and have been a bundle of emotions all week.

There’s also a lot of stuff going on in LIFE right now that has cut into my computer time — in a major way! I’ve been running around town getting ready for a book signing at a local bookstore, attending my daughter’s second grade field trip, coordinating our family’s summer schedule, and preparing for a busy weekend.

I’M GOING TO MEET THE FLYLADY!!!!!

LBY Friends: Thank you for your prayers. I feel such support from you in the group! Hopefully, next week will allow me time to catch up and visit your blogs to see how God is working in your life. For now, I must Live Beyond the Blog and try to keep up with this insane pace of life around here.

Addie	Heather*	Carol
M	Rach	Jeana
Jenn	Amanda	MamaB
GiBee	Boomama	Maria
Blair	Heather	Nancy
Janna	Flipflop	Robin
Sherry	Patricia	Tara
Lauren	HolyMama!	Faith
Christy	Eph2810	Karin
Leann	Rachel	Janice

I went through our chart this morning trying to update Jeana’s new WordPress address, and I accidentally typed in “Daystocome.com” instead of “Daystocome.net.” Whoa. You DON’T want to do that. But I hope everyone can update her new address in your code — her new FABULOUS design is much easier on my aging eyes (those Blogger dots played hide and seek with her words for me).

Once again, I learned so much this week, and I’m kicking myself that I haven’t been doing these Beth Moore studies for the past several years. My faith is growing like a weed under her teaching … a good weed, I think. The kind of weed that blooms through the cement cracks, even in the hot sun. That’s me.

I’m going to a coffee shop in a couple of weeks with the preschool moms who I did the Beth Moore Believing God study with that ended right before this one started. We’re going to discuss what we’ll do this fall — right now, some people want to do Living Beyond Yourself — woohoo! Me and my big mouth. I’d love to do it again — although I did read that the ladies in Carol’s church are revving up to start Beth Moore’s new study of Daniel, and I’m sure that will be amazing too.

My title for this post is “It’s All Greek to Me” because I honestly could not get over what I learned on Day 1. The Greek words for GRACE and JOY.

Grace = Charis
Joy = Chara

Charis means “unmerited favor.” And Chara means “joy, rejoicing, gladness — enjoyment, bliss.”

I never knew that.

Beth Moore writes:

Do you see a very close relationship between charis and chara? That’s because joy is an absolute assumption in grace. Joy is literally written into grace! God is telling us, “If you only understood what grace means and what you have received by way of it, you would never cease to rejoice!”

She gives us the verse in Luke 10:20, where Christ told the disciples, “Do not rejoice that the spirits submit to you, but rejoice that your names are written in heaven.” Yes! The joy of our salvation is all because of God’s grace in rescuing us from the pits of hell — not only in where we spend eternity, but also in this life. We don’t have to live in the pits of depression, despair, and bondage in THIS life — because God’s grace sets us free to REJOICE daily through Him.

I can’t get over this. I have so much to think about. We really miss so much of the Bible by not being able to read it in the original languages. Now Beth Moore has spoiled me rotten. I want to learn the Bible from someone who can teach it to me in the original languages — Hebrew in the Old Testament, Greek in the New Testament. And I guess there’s Aramaic somewhere in there as well.

In the Believing God study, Beth taught that FAITH leads to HOPE over and over again in scripture. Now she’s taught me that GRACE leads to JOY. These concepts are amazing to me. I may never truly understand what faith means or what grace means. But I can’t live a day without hope. And I want my life to be characterized by joy.

My kids are up! Early. On a Saturday. OK — I’ll have to finish this post mentally, while I make pancakes. I have lots I wanted to say about the video, about Beth’s statement “All we need to create an environment for rejection is relationship.” Because MAN! I’ve been rejected a lot lately, and it’s because I’ve crawled out of my shell, and I’m developing a relationship with thousands of people through writing.

And you are too, fellow bloggers. Guess what? Not everybody is going to like you or your blog topics or your ideas that show up in your posts!

Wouldn’t it be easier to log off and quit writing? Of course. Then no one could reject us. But Jesus developed relationships with people. He didn’t sit around the quiet mountaintops, meditating and praying all day. His sandals got dusty from walking the roads of humanity.

Sometimes, I get overwhelmed when I see how many people have stopped by my site — not a huge number compared to the top blogs, but still a lot for a little ol’ mom. When I write, I know some of the people who will read, and I can’t please them all. It makes me dizzy knowing how different all of you are — I can’t make you all agree with me. So some of you will reject me.

But that’s OK. The best thing I’ve learned from my long, rambling road to getting a few things published is that THICK SKIN is required to be a writer because you’re going to get rejected. I got rejected just yesterday. Thanks, but no thanks. When I send stuff off to editors and it comes back with drastic change requests, I feel like a horrible writer, a horrible person. Then I get over it, do my rewrites, and send it back off again.

It’s the same in life. We have to take a risk to develop relationships with people. They may ignore us or outright reject us. But then there are some who will respond — and we’ll be blessed with that deep CHARA, the joy that comes from the Almighty, All-merciful, Never-Failing God of the Universe.

Off to make pancakes now …

Addie	Heather*	Carol
M	Rach	Jeana
Jenn	Amanda	MamaB
GiBee	Boomama	Maria
Blair	Heather	Nancy
Janna	Flipflop	Robin
Sherry	Patricia	Tara
Lauren	HolyMama!	Faith
Christy	Eph2810	Karin
Leann	Rachel	Janice

Hello LBY group (and others visiting):

How was your week? We’re deep into the Easter weekend, so I don’t know how many of you will have time to post. We’re off to various egg hunts and family activities, so I apologize that I won’t be able to get around to visit many blogs until probably Monday morning.

This week’s lesson was the best yet — our topic was love, teaching us how to move toward a selfless agape type of love. Here’s another verse I need to hang up around my house: “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins” (1 Peter 4:8). A home full of grace is one where everyone can relax in the blessings of agape love.

I wonder how many of you are sharing all this with your husbands, if you’re married! I am. I know that one of you said your husband was watching the videos with you. That’s awesome! Well, I’ve been reading out loud to my husband, and he said the other night, “I like all that stuff you’re learning. I think I need to call up Beth Moore and see if I can make her a cake and send it to her.” OK — this was funny. My husband doesn’t make cakes! But that just shows you — we’re learning great things!

[I’m not going to blog about this — but p. 50 of the homework — that last paragraph before the questions. Whew! Amen to all that. And if it’s missing from a marriage, as Beth said in the video, this is a definite flag; in fact, it’s “Six Flags over Texas!” If you didn’t watch the video yet, you won’t know what I’m talking about — sorry!]

Here’s what happened to me this week: I have two people to thank for a MAJOR MIRACLE in my life — the first person is of course Beth Moore. In an earlier lesson, she encouraged us to get out of our comfort zones. Well, I immediately started thinking about missions — which is what I blogged about last week. And I can’t thank y’all enough for your encouraging comments and private emails. (Thank you, N. for those pictures.) Yet some of you reminded me to be content with where God has me right now — and to pray for God’s timing. It was so hard to open myself up completely last weekend … yet it ended up being a blessing after all.

The other person I have to thank is Carol, who hosted the Carnival of Beauty this week on the topic of “Aging Gracefully.” Carol’s essay has really stuck with me. And I began to realize what my comfort zone is … and what I must do.

The one thing missing from my life — are you ready? You might think I’m going to get all spiritual and say it’s God’s Word, and that’s not true. I love reading my Bible!

What I’ve been missing is EXERCISE, specifically … how can I say this without sounding gross? Sweaty exercise. Where I work out so hard that sweat pours all the toxins out of my body, and I feel like a different person when I finish. It’s not happening when I take walks outside pushing a baby stroller and watching my dog sniff things — this is fun and relaxing, but I don’t sweat at all.

SO! I know the only place in the world I’ve ever been consistent with exercise is Curves fitness center. It’s a 30-minute circuit workout for women only. There are no bulky men in tank tops and short shorts grunting in this room — what a relief. I wrote last week about how I sometimes think it would be nice to work outside of my home — well, taking the plunge to join Curves is my JOB now.

When I set my mind to do something and take it seriously, it will get done. The last time I joined Curves three years ago, I lost 55 pounds. You can read my story here. Since joining this week, I’ve already worked out three times and earned me $2 in Curves bucks! Woohoo! They have a program where if you work out three times a week during the month of April you get some special dollars that can be used to win Curves prizes — clothes, water bottles, fun stuff. I also won a hula hoop contest last night — got another buck. That was hilarious — I haven’t hula-hooped in years — but I’m actually pretty good, especially in a room full of clapping ladies saying, “Woo — you go girl!”

So, I’m hurting today. Every muscle in my legs is aching. The first two times I worked out, I couldn’t even do the machines to full capacity — I’m too weak and tired. But I did last night — I thought, “This is my job. I’m going to put effort into this.”

The humiliating part about going to Curves is that you have to be measured and weighed (if you want to). Of course, since I live in a small town, I know the girl who works there. So now she knows every detail about me — and my fitness goals as well. I wrote down that my goal is to tone up and lose 25 pounds. It’s written down — on a card! And I have a weigh-in day next month. I gotta do it!

Let me just tell you — I’m so happy there. I’ve seen tons of people I know, and I can talk while I work out. I don’t have to reset any of the machines — I just do them. No thinking involved. In fact, while I’m working out, I’m like a sponge, soaking up all the great conversations going on around me. I’ve got to remember to bring a notepad in my car to jot down some of these funny things people talk about. Y’all probably know I don’t watch a lick of TV — no time. And we only get a couple of local channels and PBS where we live. (We don’t want cable — we want out kids to be bored enough indoors so they’ll play outside! Which they do!) So I’m out of it, except for reading headlines of magazines in the grocery store.

Well, I’m catching up on the culture gossip now. For example, I’ve learned that Natalie Portman looks good with a bald head, and everybody wants to go see “V for Vendetta.”

While watching Beth Moore’s video of our lesson, I filled in the blanks to complete this sentence:
“Through the infiltrating power of the Holy Spirit, I can do things I couldn’t, feel things I didn’t, and know things I wouldn’t.”

On my own strength, I could NOT have walked into Curves — I had thousands of excuses. But this study and Carol’s gentle admonishment to take better care of my physical body — forced me to do it.

Here’s what I predict will happen:

Month 1 — Nothing will happen. I’ll see no results and feel like I’m wasting my time.
Month 2 — I’ll GAIN weight and feel even more discouraged! This is because muscle weighs more than fat. As I gain muscle and lose fat, the scale will make me feel worse.
Month 3 — Let the games begin. If I’ve been consistent with going three times a week, the pounds will drop and my husband will say, “You look like you’re getting toned up.” My arms will stop looking like tree trunks, and I’ll be able to stop wearing stretch pants and actually fit into some of my old clothes again. And have an excuse to go shopping for a new spring outfit!

I’ll let you know my progress. Also — exercising like this where I really work hard and sweat makes me thirsty. Which means I crave water … not caffeinated drinks. Drinking a lot of water further cleanses toxins from my body … and my mind. I’m looking forward to thinking clearly again, something I haven’t been able to do since Baby #5 entered the world a year ago.

Thank you for reading, if you’ve made it through today’s post. This is really for me … since I’ll print this out and put it in my notebook. Someday, I’ll look back on this and see how God is working in my life — getting me out of my comfort zone to get my body in shape, so I’ll have more energy to run this marathon He’s called me to run.

I wish you all a glorious Easter, full of JOY — as we celebrate the resurrection of our Savior, Jesus Christ!

Addie	Heather*	Carol
M	Rach	Jeana
Jenn	Amanda	MamaB
GiBee	Boomama	Maria
Blair	Heather	Nancy
Janna	Flipflop	Robin
Sherry	Patricia	Tara
Lauren	HolyMama!	Faith
Christy	Eph2810	Karin
Leann	Rachel	Janice
This is a list of the women participating in the study and the links to their blogs. New postings on the study will be published for the next ten weeks, between Friday 8pm – Saturday 8am. Please feel free to visit each of us and comment. Everyone is welcome to participate in this discussion as we seek to live beyond ourselves. May God bless you richly from the hearing of His word.