Today represents a huge change in my life — it’s the first day of preschool. My 3-year-old has felt left behind since school started a month ago for his older siblings. He’s been carrying his little backback around the house and asking me, “Can you give me some homework?” He is SO ready for school.

He’ll be going three mornings a week to our church preschool. This is the seventh year in a row we’ve had a child enrolled. Hard to believe! I don’t think he has the jitters at all because he’s so familiar with everything. He has a new teacher and new classmates, but the playground is familiar territory.

To be honest, it’s me who has the butterflies. Why in the world can’t I outgrow being nervous around people I don’t know all that well? Every year, I have to get to know a new group of moms. And I can’t help it — I wonder where I fit in.

There are some moms who are easy to categorize — there are the tennis moms, who drop off their kids in their perky tennis outfits, barely covering their tan, muscular legs. I don’t like them very much (just kidding.)

Then there are the entrepreneurial moms, who greet you with a new catalog of whatever they’re selling, and you wonder if they’re being nice to you because they like you or because they want you to buy something or host a party. Those shopping parties stress me out, so I don’t do them very often.

Then there are the work-outside-the-home moms, who dash indoors wearing suits and pumps, their ear cocked into a cell phone. They make me feel underdressed and wonder if I’ll ever be able to have enough time and money to get a decent hairstyle that’s NOT a ponytail.

There are also the PERFECT SAHMs, who look beautiful and put together at 8 am, always on time, their kids the same. They’re the ones who volunteer for everything and make all the cute crafts for holiday gifts. (Unlike me — I show up with juice boxes … late.)

And there are a few dads, who sometimes look haggard as they rush to get to work on time.

New backpacks, ribbons in curly pigtails, smocked jumpers and overalls, hugs and tears, everybody snapping pictures — this is what the first day of preschool has been like for me seven years in a row.

So where do I fit in? I’m not one of the easy-to-categorize moms. I work at home, though few people ask what I do. I’ve been around long enough so that I know a few familiar faces, but most of my friends are either busy homeschooling or have gone back to work outside of the home.

This week, I’ll start my new Bible study, which will meet upstairs from the preschool. I’m very excited about that — we’re doing Beth Moore’s Living Beyond Yourself — YEA! I talked it up since I loved our online group — but I’m starting over again. This time, using a workbook like everyone else.

I’ve got a few butterflies about our Bible Study too. And I’m also the new girl in my exercise class. I still can barely keep up. There are no classes for “Tired Moms Who Just Want a Break.” No, I’m sweating to rock/rap music in the “Body Combat” class, learning how to “punch, kick, jab, and hook” because — hey, you can’t be too picky when there’s good childcare provided.

I did run into an old friend yesterday at the gym — and it seems too good to be true. We’ve been “birthday party” friends for years, but haven’t really seen each other without kids around. It turns out our daughters are in class together at the same school, and we’ve got kids in the same preschool as well. “This is the first time in TEN YEARS that I’ve been able to get out of the house without having to find a babysitter, ” she told me, after dropping off her youngest at preschool.

She invited me to start working out with her. So, I’ve got butterflies. A new friend! Please, Lord, please help me be a good friend to Mary. Help me to be encouraging and go beyond the surface. I really need a friend this year!

If any of you feel this way — you get nervous at stepping out of your comfort zone — maybe you can read this post and know you’re not alone. We’re all misfits this side of heaven!