This week’s Carnival of Beauty is hosted by Marla of Just Marla, and our topic, of all things, is “The Bible.” As I’ve given this some thought during the week, I keep realizing how much I need the Bible as a mom. Are there other people like me, who feel like they’re dry and thirsty without daily refreshment from the Word?

I periodically look through my list of key phrases people type into search engines to find my site. It sometimes baffles me how a certain phrase will lead someone here. This past month, I noticed these phrases among many with the keyword “mom/mother:”

— frustrated mom blog
— bone tired mother
— advice for moms raising teenage boys
— frustrated mom of preschoolers
— christian words of comfort to a mother who is having a hard time with a teenager trying to discipline

I imagine what led a woman to her computer to type in one of these phrases. Perhaps she had a long day of work — either away from home or AT home with her children; she drove her mini-van to the grocery store or Stuff-Mart at least once during the day to pick up some necessity, kids in tow; she prepared at least one meal for her family, though possibly all three, including snacks (semi-healthy of course); then she drove her kids to all their activities and kept up with the other moms; she oversaw her kids’ homework; helped them with baths (if they’re still young); read them a bedtime story (or three or four); listened to their prayers; and tucked them in bed. Of course, somewhere in all that, if she has a husband, she shares time with him, discussing the day, planning for the next day, maybe even having a real conversation once the kids are in bed.

At some point during the day, she taps into her computer, “Bone Tired Mother.”

This is what I imagine, at least. She’d be even more bone tired if she’s a single mother, with no one to help share the load, and financial strain weighing heavily on her mind.

So what can I say to encourage these moms?

What I’d like to say is that there was another woman, in another time, who was also bone tired, exhausted from a fast lifestyle that made her feel cheap and used. She felt unloved and unworthy. When she went to draw water from a well in her city one day, a man who was there asked if she’d also get him some water.

“How can you ask me for a drink?” [she questioned Him.]

Jesus answered her, “If you knew the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, you would have asked Him and He would have given you living water.”

“Sir,” the woman said. “You have nothing to draw with and the well is deep. Where can you get this living water?” …

Jesus answered, “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life” (John 4:9-13 NIV).

A spring of water … doesn’t that sound refreshing?

These verses are what I want to pass along to the bone tired, frustrated mom who is trying to manage toddlers or discipline teens. Dear mom, I hope you will find a few minutes today to read from the source of the well — maybe even opening up your own Bible to read John 4 and underlining or circling the phrase “living water.”

Then, if you want to see how the Word of God can change someone’s life, I have to send you to a powerful testimony I just discovered yesterday. Over a period of several years, through friendship and sharing Christian books, Carol of She Lives shared Christ with her housekeeper, who has now discovered Living Water. I know you’re busy and you have so much else to do and read, but if you have a chance to read She’s Got a Housekeeper (in three parts), this is what life is all about! Thank you, Carol, for sharing that with us!!

When the Samaritan woman at the well met Jesus, she couldn’t wait to go tell everyone else the Good News! I think that’s why many of us blog — we want to do the same thing in the 21st century.

When we’re thirsty, God’s Word is a well, always offering us a continual source of refreshment.

Let us drink deeply, sisters.

Were any of you glued to the TV set over the weekend watching the Olympics? Ice and snow are truly exotic to our children, so we all relished the skating and skiing.

We loved watching the Italians capture the gold medal in last night’s cross-country event. The Detroit Free Press describes Giorgio di Centa’s victory with this great sentence: “The horde of Italian fans lingered, savoring one last moment of Olympic triumph.” (I love the words linger and savor, don’t you?)

Yet I had this strange realization as I watched the dazzling figure skaters while humbly wiping down crumb-covered countertops. It finally sank in that I will NEVER be in the Olympics! It’s too late — I’m not good at any sport and now I’m too old! I mulled over that idea for a while as I watched the athletes experience their lifetime moment of glory.

You see, when I was growing up, I just knew that I was bound for the Olympics. It wasn’t a matter of IF; it was a matter of WHEN! I was quite serious about gymnastics when I was in elementary and middle school, and my teammates and I all had Olympic aspirations. In fact, we figured there would be some year in the 80s when the whole Olympic team would be our squad!

I turned in school homework assignments covered in Olympic-ringed doodles. My friends and I made medals and certificates for each other: Gold Medals on the Balance Beam and Floor, Silver on the Bars, and Bronze on the Vault (never was very good at that.) Those were my childhood dreams!

But just as I was feeling a bit disappointed, I happened to visit one of my favorite blogs, Simplifying Motherhood, written by Trish Berg. She’s come up with a whole new set of Olympic sporting events in which participants must all be moms. One new event she proposes will be “The Laundry Marathon:”

Each participant will be given twenty-four hours and two tons of dirty, stained clothes, unsorted. Their goal will be to sort, wash, dry and fold as many loads of laundry as they can in one twenty-four hour period. The winner is the mom who finishes the most laundry by tonnage, and who can still see straight.

I’m in training for that one now, as well as another Olympic-worthy thrill, “The Speed Shopping Commute:”

Each mom will be given four obnoxious kids (not hers of course), all under eight years old. She will have to load them into the minivan, head to the grocery store, and buy everything on her shopping list. Then, she has to get the kids and the groceries back into the house safely while walking on a sheet of ice in her driveway. Points will be deducted for every bag of M & M’s she gives the kids to keep them quiet at the store, and for slipping on the ice.

You’ll have to visit Trish’s site to read the rest of her hilarious post, The Motherhood Olympics. And while you’re there, stop in to say hello! Trish is an expert at making me feel better about myself, about mothering, and about life.

P.S. I gotta thank Kelsey at Holy Mama! for my new Bible Promise graphic in my sidebar. I followed the link from her site and discovered that I’m known as a “webmaster.” Someone has made it simple for you to add a customized daily scripture box to your site. My daughters helped me pick out the colors — although of course they wanted bright magenta and violet (sorry — didn’t look good on my site). The fun thing is that the scripture changes every day! And I don’t even have to do anything! Thanks, Holy Mama!

The Carnival of Beauty is today, hosted by Michele of Chasing Contentment. You can visit her site and read a collection of nine posts written on the theme of The Beauty of Friendship. Michele says:

This morning, I found an e-card in my in-box from a friend, thanking me for my friendship. The card mentioned that February is International Friendship Month, a fitting time for a Carnival about friendship.

She also took the time to look up several scriptures relating to friendship — so this whole Carnival is inspiring, and I’m glad I’ll have this link in my archives. I’m sure I’ll be peeking at it again in the months to come. I’ve enjoyed that Technorati search tool in my sidebar a lot lately — I’ve found a blog to be a great place to store my thoughts that would have gotten lost if I hadn’t recorded them.

A quick note of congratulations to those of you who are finalists in the Share the Love Blog Awards. You can vote for your favorites until February 27. I only recognized a few of the finalists, and one is Katy’s Fallible blog, which is my pick for best design. I recognized her to be a kindred spirit because she also interviewed Mary DeMuth on her blog tour. If you love the French language and antique beauty, you’ll love Katy’s site!

Hmmm…how can I say this? More than ever, I appreciate Sallie of Two Talent Living’s diligence in making sure the blogs nominated for her awards last fall were clean for viewing. I visited a few of the finalist’s blogs to consider voting, and I felt like a frog who hit boiling water and jumped right on out. Why do women blog about such crass things? I don’t know. I guess I don’t get out much beyond the blogs in my blogroll and participants in the Carnival of Beauty (and those of you kind enough to leave me comments!) Just a warning, in case you were heading that way.

Another fun test for y’all.

This week’s topic for the Carnival of Beauty is “Friendship,” hosted by Michele of Chasing Contentment. I’m having such a great time reflecting on these topics — I think about ideas while I’m going about my daily routines. It’s amazing what inspiration comes to my mind while I’m washing dishes, which is why my handy dandy notebook has wrinkled pages from soapsud-induced mad scribbling. (Does anyone else feel like you’ll die if you don’t write something down?)

So while I was thinking about friendship, sweet Blair at Scribblings by Blair tapped me for a Valentine meme about marriage. The question was, “What’s one thing you’ve learned about marriage that you could pass along to others?” I started writing about my parents — because most of what I know about marriage comes from observing them my whole life — but then I thought — Hey! This topic ties in great with friendship. So I saved my answer for this Carnival.

Being married to your best friend is one of the greatest gifts life has to offer. I thank God every day for this gift in my home now. But I also had this modeled for me growing up. My mom and dad are the best of friends. My mom brags about my dad all the time, and he brags about her. This is what I’ve observed makes a happy marriage.

Next month, my parents will celebrate their 40th wedding anniversary. They’ve spent four decades of life together. I love hearing them tell stories of how they met, dated, and spent their early years of marriage. My dad was in the Air Force, and I was born on an Air Force base in Kansas City, Missouri. We moved around a few times, so I was a toddler in Texas a while before we moved to Georgia. (Just wanted y’all Texas friends to know that.)

Over the years, my parents’ friendship has deepened and weathered the storms that life sends through. They took the calling seriously to raise three children and make sure we were in church every Sunday. No matter how busy we were, Mom always had us sit down together for supper, and I enjoyed watching my parents interact with each other — like friends — and talk and laugh about their day. The TV was never on while we ate — and everybody pitched into the conversation. (Even when I was a snooty-hooty teenager and dinner interrupted my busy agenda of phone calls and fashion planning.)

So, to answer Blair’s meme, marriage is all about friendship — first of all in having a friendship with God though Jesus Christ so you have the perfect role model for relationships — and second of all, it’s a lifelong friendship that grows and changes and is an adventure.

I’m still learning about this, which is why I love reading women’s blogs who describe their happy marriages. To double the blessings of my life, God gave me a husband whose parents also celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary last year. So, they should be the ones writing about marriage! I’m still the quiet observer, writing things down with my soapy dishpan hands.

How do you stay friends with someone for an entire lifetime? Here’s what I see. Marriage is a living thing, like a plant, that grows and needs constant attention. We were reading a book with our kids the other day about seeds, and it showed one of those giant Redwood trees in California. The last line of the book said something like, “Can you believe this tall tree used to be a seed?”

On our wedding day, we’re like a seed, planted into the ground. Then through years of growth toward the “Son,” we become like a tree. (Psalm 119:105 says, “Your word is a lamp to my feet and a LIGHT for my path.”). Our roots should be deep enough so we’ll weather various storms that pass through.

How do we cultivate that seed? From watching my parents, I’d say:

#1 Surround each other with love and grace, the same way God gives it to you.
#2 Work on your sense of humor — laugh about the crazy things life deals at you! Have a lot of inside jokes that only your family knows about.
#3 Keep finding creative ways to celebrate the happy events — and tell stories about them over and over.

I could write a ton more — but I know you’ve got more blogs to click into — so I’ll just say this: if you’re a parent, the best gift you can ever give your children is to cultivate the seed of marriage and show them what a lifelong friendship looks like. It’s more important than anything else. I can’t thank my parents enough for giving me four decades of love, laughter, and celebration worth writing about!

P.S. If you don’t have a friendship like this as a role model, you can learn so much from great books! The Bible is #1. But I highly recommend The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. And if you feel like a pioneer in this parenting gig, I just finished reading Mary DeMuth’s inspiring book, Building the Christian Family You Never Had — it’s a wonderful resource!

I took this test entitled, “What language should you learn?” This was an interesting result. I know how to read and speak some Japanese, but not Chinese. The written languages have some similarities, so it might be something I could pick up someday. But Chinese is a tonal language — it seems really hard to me!

Yet it’s the language of about 1/5 of the world’s population, right? I’ve discovered that studying a language is truly the best way to understand the heart of a culture. I took German two years in high school, French two years in college, and have about four years of formal Japanese study. But I’ve forgotten so much — Use it or lose it, they say! It’s funny how well I can remember the songs we learned …

How about you? Do you speak or read any languages besides English? What’s your native tongue?

You Should Learn Chinese

Surprised? You shouldn’t be – Chinese is perfect for an ambitious person like you. You’re a natural entrepreneur, and a billion people are waiting to do business with you!

Iris passed this along to me — some bloggers participate in something called “Thankful Thursday.” I’m not really sure how it all works — I think you write some things you’re thankful for on Thursday, and you send the link to somebody’s blog, and there’s a blogroll for that.

If you’re interested, check out the link from the graphic. It’s nice to know things like this are going on in the world…being thankful and sharing it with others…

I don’t know if I’ll be able to formally participate, but I’ll say I’m thankful this week that I paid our bills yesterday, our kids are healthy, and I’ve got some interesting plans with my sister this weekend. Also, I really liked that “Remembering” meme I posted on Monday — it’s reminded me how much I enjoy teaching.

I’ve been tapped by Sting My Heart for this blogger meme. I don’t do many of these, but I did the Seven Sevens back in December. They’re kind of like chain letters, which I never forward, but actually, this one’s kind of nice. It made me do some remembering, which God likes for us to do.

What was I doing…?

10 Years ago (1996):

1. I was preparing to become a new mom, reading What to Expect When You’re Expecting and how-to books on labor, nursing, baby development, etc. Then our son was born, and our lives were changed forever!
2. We lived in a small neighborhood, and I took walks every day with my neighbors, who were also new parents.
3. I finished my last semester of graduate school, completing a master’s degree in English education.
4. I taught high school sophomores and seniors how to read Shakespeare and write essays — and then I cried while I read their journals.
5. My best friend from when I lived in Japan came to visit me to meet our new baby — but she died of cancer on Thanksgiving Day (2000), and I didn’t realize I’d never see her again.

5 Years ago (2001):

1. We put our house on the market the week of 9/11/01. I was afraid the world was coming to an end after the Twin Towers were struck.
2. We had chickens in our backyard, and I ground my wheat and made bread every week.
3. I was reading a lot of books about homeschooling and getting ready to start teaching my oldest son how to read.
4. I was quilting, smocking, and taking piano lessons — and realizing that I’d never be very good at any of those things.
5. I found out we were expecting our fourth child, and I had a late miscarriage that ended with emergency surgery to save my life.

1 Year ago (February 2005):
1. I stayed home with my toddler who colored the walls, while my three older children were in school.
2. I was pregnant with our fifth child, who was born in the spring.
3. We joined a new church, and our two older children were baptized.
4. I finished up several home writing courses and attended three writers’ conferences.
5. I signed a contract to write a small Mother’s Day gift book, and I wrote it.

Yesterday (Saturday Feb. 4, 2006):
1. My 3-year-old son came and wrapped his arms around my neck and said, “Mama, I love underwear.” (No more diapers!)
2. I turned in my manuscript for a devotional book on “Hope” that I’m helping to write.
3. I edited the introduction and first three chapters of my friend Trish’s book for moms. It will be published in 2007, and she wrote my name in the acknowledgements.
4. My youngest daughter learned to crawl, and I watched her — happy and sad at the same time.
5. We enjoyed a delicious dinner at my husband’s parents’ house, which I’ll tell you about in the post that follows.

5 Songs I know all the words to:
Lots of praise songs — I love praise songs.

5 Greatest Joys:
1. The Word of God and my relationship with Christ.
2. My family — I love growing closer to my husband as the years go by and watching our children grow up. Plus we’re blessed with wonderful extended families.
3. I enjoy encouraging people to pursue their dreams.
4. I love taking pictures of joyful events that I hope to write about someday when I have more time.
5. I’ve discovered I really enjoy travel writing and would like to do more of it.

The other parts of this meme are:
5 Things I’d do with a million dollars
5 Places I’d run away to
5 Things I’d never wear
5 Favorite toys
5 Favorite books or TV shows
5 People I tag

I can’t think of anything else right now — so I’ll stop here! If any of you reading this would like me to tag you, then I tag you. Have fun!
😉

Iris is hostessing the Carnival of Beauty on her site today. The topic, The Beauty of Gentleness, brought in quite an eclectic gathering of thoughts — and it’s like visiting old friends now when I amble into these women’s blogs. (I feel like I need to wipe my feet on a doormat or something — or bring some flowers!)

Here’s a quote I found today from Daily Christian Quote. I think Billy Graham and I seem to be on the same wavelength with what I wrote about yesterday:

Too many women have too much leisure time for their own good. They have time for criticism, gossip, faultfinding, and complaining. They have time for idle games and lay too much attention to things of the flesh. There are other women who have too little time for the enduring things of life. They are too busy flitting about doing this and that. They have great activity and much doing, but they lack time for building Christian characters. Both kinds of women — the too-idle and the too-busy need to take time for meditation and quiet repose in prayer to God. They need time to cultivate their souls that in turn they may cultivate their children’s lives.

Billy Graham
Billy Graham Organization

I love that phrase, “cultivate their souls.” That will give me something good to think about today.

Here’s a book I read last summer that I’d love to share with you. If you’re looking for something to curl up with by the fire this winter, then Carol Kent and Ellie Kay have a real treat for you. Some of these stories were so hilarious, I was laughing out loud — and others had me in tears. Most of all, they pointed me to Christ, the true Storyteller.

Each of the 50 stories begins with a funny or inspiring quote and ends with a scripture that draws upon the theme of the story. It doesn’t matter what stage of mothering you’re in, you’ll connect with these women. If you’re expecting your first child, you’ll love the labor and delivery stories (Whew, Ellie!). Reading about fellow diaper-changing mavens, homeschooling with a mouse on the loose, and reflections in the garden are just a few of my favorites.

You’ll crack up reading Jill Gregory’s story, “This Isn’t the Life I Signed Up For!” when you see what she discovers while bathing her son. In pure exhaustion, she does what many of us do: she called her mom with a cry for Help!! And she comes to this wonderful conclusion:

I can honestly smile now, realizing that my life has taken a more difficult turn than I expected, but I am learning firsthand that I have a God of refuge who is my Comforter and my Teacher. He has given me the important job of loving a special-needs child and of sharing my story with other mothers who have had unexpected “job descriptions” in their own roles as parents … This is not the life I signed up for, but it’s the assignment God has for me today.

With titles such as “Did I really Say Drug Free?,” “Keeping the Groom — Dumping the Dress,” “Girls’ Day Jammin” and “A Tale of Two Manicures,” there’s something for every woman to enjoy. If you’re looking for a gift for an expectant or new mom — or for a friend who could use some encouragement, I highly recommend Kisses of Sunshine for Moms. Plus — it’s just downright pretty and would look fun in a gift basket!

One thing I really enjoy about this book is that it makes me feel a whisper of creativity, urging me to write. When I read someone else’s mothering experiences, it makes me reflect on my own. Do you write things down somewhere? If you can at least jot down a line or two of a special memory, one day you can go back and write about it. Reflect on what God taught you — or what you’d like to share with your children someday.

I think it brings joy to God’s heart when we remember the good things in life and record our memories with words. Here’s one of the quotes I love: “Shared stories build a relational bridge that Jesus can walk across from your heart to others” (Rick Warren).